How to declutter with your kids
Want to work alongside your kids to get their rooms or playroom decluttered and ready for play? In this blog post I will share all of my tips for working with your kids and helping them learn the valuable lesson of decluttering their spaces.
Hi, I’m Erin. I am a professional organizer based out of Austin, TX. More importantly, I am a mom to three kids of my own. Their current ages are 11, 9 and 7 but I have worked with my kids their entire lives on the art of decluttering. It’s never too late to start instilling this skill in your children, and you will never regret it.
Decluttering can feel like a never ending task, especially when you have kids. Toys seem to multiply overnight, clothes pile up, and books overflow from every shelf. I’m here to tell you it is possible to stay clutter-less (not clutter-free, let’s be honest with ourselves) with kids. Decluttering is an important skill for kids to learn as it will stay with them their entire lives. They will gain knowledge and understanding in what it takes to keep their spaces organized and the many benefits that come with an organized space! By the end of this blog post you will have the confidence to work with your kids in the decluttering process, even with the littlest helpers (or hinderers!).
Before we jump in to any decluttering session with our kids we need to make sure we are in the right mindset. Make sure you have your patience pants on, are well hydrated and not hangry. Your attitude towards this whole process is extremely important. You are also in charge of keeping your emotions and comments to yourself. Do not say things like “are you sure you want to get rid of this?” or “but this is brand new” or “(a relative or friend) will be so sad if you don’t keep this.” NO! These are all counter productive statements that will cause second guessing and guilt. Your child is in control of the space, right? Therefore, they get to control what lives in the space- not you. Your goal at the end of this process is for your child to be happy in their room/playroom.
Ok, let’s dive in.
1. The Power of Involving Kids
Let's be honest, kids are never thrilled about decluttering. They only envision decluttering as ALL of their toys leaving FOREVER. But involving them in the process will show them that this is not the case at all. The goal of decluttering is making room for the things that are loved and letting go of the items that are no longer being used.
Make it Fun: Turn on some of their favorite music, set a goal with a reward if it is accomplished, offer lots of praise in words or in affection. Some examples might be going out for ice cream when you are done, or having a friend over for a play date. You know what motivates your child, so use it to your advantage.
Explain the "Why": Explain the benefits of having a decluttered and organized space. "Less stuff means more space for us to play!" or "Cleaning up helps us find the things we really love!" or “If you are done playing with this toy, let’s give it to someone so they can have fun and play with it”
Give Choices: Instead of "throw this away," offer choices: "Do you want to keep this or donate it to another child who would love it?". If a toy is broken or damaged, explain to your child why it belongs in the trash instead of the donation pile. Have realistic expectations for your child depending on their age and maturity. The goal here is for your child to want to declutter (as much as possible) so you set the tone with your actions and words.
2. Create Zones and Conquer
Tackling the entire room at once is a recipe for disaster (and a meltdown). Start with a small, manageable area. In my kids’s rooms we divide the space into zones. We tackle a zone at a time and then we do a check in with each other to see if anyone needs a break. Parents- this goes for you too! Make sure that if you feel frustration creeping in that you take a break. Here are the zones we use in our home:
The closet: Focus on just the closet and go through its contents… including clothing. Check for stained or torn items and donate or toss accordingly
A shelving unit: Go through everything on the shelves and make sure it is still relevant to their age and interests
A toy bin: Dump everything out on the floor and sort items into categories- dolls, cars, fidgets, legos, etc. Once everything is sorted you can see how much there is and can declutter from there
A desk: Go through each marker, pencil, coloring book, notebook and assess what has been well loved and can still be used
3. Make 4 Piles
This method is a lifesaver for any decluttering project:
Keep: Items your child plays with regularly and truly loves.
Donate: Toys in good condition that are no longer played with, but could bring joy to another child.
Trash: Broken toys, items with missing parts, and anything unsafe.
Sell: Yes- sell! This is a huge incentive for kids to declutter. Here is how I do this in my home:
First, we make sure that we have all of the pieces to the toy in question. That everything is clean (wipe down/clean as needed) and it is in working order.
Together we search what the toy is currently selling for at a major retailer and discuss what we believe the toy is currently worth. The price of the toy to be sold has to be agreed upon between the adult and child, teach your kiddo why it isn’t worth what the retailer is selling it for brand new
Take pictures and get the item ready to list. I do sell toys on behalf of my kids on Facebook Marketplace. I have them help write the description and set the toy up for pictures
Post the item!
Set clear boundaries: I tell my kids that I will only list the item for 7 days on Facebook Marketplace. We can discuss adjusting the price after a couple of days if they want to and reiterate that the toy will be donated within 7 days of being listed for sale. If the item does sell, that money goes to my child- again, huge incentive and there is so much learning happening in the process.
4. Regular Purges
In my home I declutter one on one with each of my kids every 6 months or so. I try to time it just before the holidays, a birthday or whenever the space is getting too difficult for my child to clean up on their own.
5. Be Patient and Persistent
Decluttering doesn’t happen overnight. Don't get discouraged if it takes time. Remember, the goal is to create a more peaceful and organized space for your child. If they are insisting on keeping a toy that you know they haven’t played with in a long time, let them keep it. This shows that you trust their decision making skills and that what they say matters to you. Next time you declutter together, talk about the toy again and whether they are ready to let it go. The biggest mistake you can make when decluttering with your child is to force them to get rid of items. We want to instill confidence in our kids that the space is theirs and it is their responsibility to keep it decluttered and clean.
If your child is hesitant to the entire decluttering process, here are some of my thoughts:
Try again in a week or a month, and again in a week or a month after that if they are still resisting
Start VERY small. Maybe it’s one item a week
Reiterate the benefits of decluttering their space (easier to clean up, make other kids happy with the toys they are done with, earn money for selling toys, etc)
Come up with a better reward for their efforts. Discuss with your child what will encourage them to participate
Maybe it’s you. I know, this feels mean to say, but hear me out. For example, my kids do not listen to me when it comes to math. No matter what I do they simply will not listen to me because it is not what their teacher said (sound familiar?). Decluttering may be a road block for you and your child- and that is okay! Sometimes kids have to hear things from someone other than their parent, it just is what it is. It is no reflection on your parenting or your relationship with your child. Try to recruit another family member to step in or reach out to an organizer. I love working one on one with kids in their spaces!
Bonus Tip: Don't forget to declutter your own belongings! Children learn by example. When they see you making conscious decisions about what you keep and what you let go of, they're more likely to embrace the decluttering process themselves.
Decluttering with your child can be a rewarding experience, offering them a sense of responsibility and the opportunity to make decisions. Whether you start small or tackle larger areas, the key is to make it fun and rewarding. Good luck, and I look forward to hearing your stories and insights!
Want to read more on decluttering tips and advice? We were featured on the Rent. blog! Check out the recent article we were quoted in: Decluttering Checklist: How to Start Your New Year Off Fresh.
